we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Randomize