Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize