Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
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