covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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