No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
