New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
