spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
