I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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