i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
