Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
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