Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
