Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
