I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I would fuck him just for his dog
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize