I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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