I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
