Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
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