I smell stomach acid.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I have fence marks all over my body
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
