where am i from again
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
