Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
that's an acceptable place to lick
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
