Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
