He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
