Christians are straight up FREAKS
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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