I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
