I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
