I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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