You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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