The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
from now on my penis is your penis
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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