i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
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