I'm drive I can fine osifer
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
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