Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
