It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
im holly from the hills drunk
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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