Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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