Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
