So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
