How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
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