I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
