thus making me awesome and them whores
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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