I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
