That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
