This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
