Yo dont text me then not text me
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
