Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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