only if we run a train.
done.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
