i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
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