I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
We got so high we made milksteak
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
