sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
