Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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