also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
he quoted the bible to break up with me
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
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