ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
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