she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Randomize
